52 weeks of gratitude – Week 8

Writing at least weekly has already changed my perspective. It’s another way that I can take time to honor myself. I won’t say that what I write is that good or helpful to other people. My brain feels like crusted over tectonic plates ready to give if I keep at it. At one time I think that I was actually pretty good and if my creative writing hadn’t slowed down over the years I think it would be quite good now. It’s all a process.

I have been spending this week at work getting ready for the school year to start. I’m about a days worth of work away from having every piece of paper filed away in my band room! Had the air-conditioner not busted I probably would have already been there. I’ve already sat down and begun ordering things for the new year and scheduled a lot of what could be scheduled so early on. Tomorrow we interview for our new assistant and I’m optimistic about what can be accomplished in the new year. I feel like a lot has been done to help set this year up as a success.

I tend to sell myself short. A lot. I’m my own worst enemy, but the problem is that I just can’t turn my thoughts off. Instead I try to keep my mind busy and distracted so that it doesn’t wander too much into overthinking everything. I’m working on stepping back and trying to see my strengths and flaws the way I would see anyones. I tend to give everyone I know the benefit of the doubt except myself. I have learned over time to work with the natural flow of things much more easily. I do still have the instinct to fight against every current if given a choice. I’m working on that as well. I think that I am allowing my highest good on this journey of life. Sure she’s gotten beat up a little bit with what happens to the living, but my good is still there. I believe that all people at their core are good and want to lead happy, good lives. I believe that all people start off wanting to do right, and wanting to be amazing. I know that people along the way are lost or pushed aside by the force of other people and living, and most of those people reach out for help getting back on to fulfilling their dreams. Unfortunately not everyone is seen when they are waving for help and that’s when they stop trying. To do my greatest good I think I need to continue to seek out those people that need help getting on the path again.

I’m grateful that I’ve had a few people reach out and grab me throughout my life, and that I can recognize that for what it is. I’m grateful for the new perspectives that I’m being offered, and for all of the time I’ve had for self-reflection this week. I’m also very grateful for the time to get my room and job much more in order than it ever has been before the beginning of the school year.

Have a good week.